Testimonies

---

Cedric Royea

My “story” starts back when I was born in 1941. When I was a kid living at home, my folks claimed to be religious, but it was not talked about much and we only went to church when someone got married or died. My dad and mom knew a couple of swear words that I was not allowed to use at least around them. I did go to Bible class once or twice with my nieces and nephews when I visited my brother and his wife, Cecil and Mildred Royea during summertime, but it was mostly making stuff like bookends and other things.

When I graduated and left for the Air Force my folks gave me a Bible. It was a 3”x5” copy of the NewTestament with no index. I still have it, and it is like new. So that tells you something of how much I used it. I think maybe my mom and dad did that for all their sons when we left for the service. That covers all the exposure to spiritual things between my birth and when I left home in 1960. The term usedfor this lifestyle in the Bible is “Of this world”.

My first real exposure to anything seriously religious was when I got to Limestone, Maine. Living in the barracks got to be pretty boring and I wasn’t the partying type. One day my roomy invited me to go with him to a Bible study group. It was off base and at night in the house of a local potato farmer, Dana Cushman. I had a good time, learned some Bible stuff but nothing was mentioned about repentance or life changes. It was refreshing to do something with my time. I don’t recall when I stopped attending. 

Life had been good to me most of the time and it continued to be so except after I got married (1962) to my high school sweetheart, Marilyn. We found that finances, places to live, and food expenses started playing big parts in our life together. So, religion was not a factor in either of our lives. Our family started growing, (Paul and Brian were born) and life was good (most of the time). So, we had plenty of things besides church on Sundays to think about. We were still living the worldly lifestyle.

As I was promoted through the ranks, responsibilities increased as did TDY (Temporary Duty) assignments away from home, providing even more reason to take life and deal with it as it happened. This was during the Cuban Missile Crisis; John F. Kennedy was assassinated, and world events wereleaning to another world war. 

We had moved onto base and got settled in when orders for Puerto Rico came down. So, we were off to Puerto Rico for three years. Church was still not even an afterthought. We were living life as it came day by day and figured we were doing as well as others. We even had another addition to our family(Daniel). Next, we got orders for stateside duty. At least we traveled back as a family together. Our Mustang that we bought in Puerto Rico was shipped and waiting for us in South Carolina for the trip to Rapid City, South Dakota. 

A couple of years went by, and we lived on the base. Finances were a LITTLE better so even without church we were doing ok; until the day I came home with orders for a six-month tour to Okinawa in support of the Vietnam war. This was now the early 70s, but we had each other’s backs and Marilyn was a trooper. Without her it would not have been the same.

We went through the 6-month separation and things returned to “normal”. We enjoyed the area; stock car racing, Mount Rushmore, Badlands to visit, etc. Dan got lost until we found him in a neighbor’shouse enjoying himself. All this happened without church or even the thought of it.

Then one day the inevitable happened; orders saying I had been selected for a yearlong tour in SoutheastAsia. This turned our world upside down as it did with most families this was happening to. But deep down I felt it was my duty to take my turn in the barrel. Marilyn was hit hard. So hard that she wanted me (us) to go to Canada to avoid this assignment. (That would have been desertion.) Much talking tookplace and we both expressed how we felt, and it was decided that if I went, she might not be waiting for me to come back. But my devotion to duty overrode my sorrow that I would be gone a year. She moved back to Richford and there she became mother and father and assumed the role that many wives of service men fill. We still neglected church for the year I was gone.

But the saying “there are no atheists in foxholes” came to pass shortly after my arrival in Vietnam.

The day we arrived we had “In Briefing” as is usual for newcomers. It covered many things. One was what to do when sirens went off warning of incoming rocket or mortar attacks or perimeter threats. We were told to hit the ground, cover our heads, etc. Briefing finished: another person and I were walking back to the barracks which were downhill. Truck traffic was always heavy on this road.  We were walking along shooting the breeze and this truck coasted by us. Shutting off the engine and coasting in gear can cause a buildup of raw gas fumes in the muffler and when the engine is started again it can cause a large backfire (like gunshot or an explosion) to come out the exhaust which is exactly what this driver did! When we heard it both of us dove for the ground like we had just been told to do. Needless to say, the guys in the truck had done this trick before! 

That night alone in my room I got thinking about the whole day including; “what if that had been a real rocket? Would I be alive or dead my first day in country?”  The reality of it all came down on me and THAT IS WHEN IT HAPPENED. My heart ached for my family, my wife, and three young boys who might have to grow up without me as their father. I recall saying this: “God; if you allow me to live through this and to see my three boys grow into young men, I will do anything you ask of me.”That was my foxhole moment. Did I attend church? no way. 

As you know by reading this, I came back (thankfully). But there was always the gnawing reminder of the thing I had asked for and I my unfulfilled promise. For one reason or another, through all these years, I was negligent and developed the Missouri State nickname to my life. Seeing is believing.

[While much of Missouri’s history is tied to the mighty rivers that flow through it, the "Show Me State" got its nickname because of the devotion of its people to simple common sense. In 1899, Rep. Willard D. Vandiver said, "Frothy eloquence neither convinces nor satisfies me. Show me.]

I did figure out that my life had lacked that one thing that must be a part of whatever a person believes in: Faith. Faith is the foundation to build anything on be it jobs, relationships, or whatever. You mustbelieve in it to really make it work. I could see things and be awed by them but the thought that I kept true to was that EVERYTHING HAS TO BEGIN WITH SOMETHING AND NOTHING WAS EVER MADE FROM NOTHING—Headed in the right direction, but Worldly still.

Life was good to me for the most part and looking back things always seemed to work out for the best. I had many career experiences that were positive. We weren’t rich but we made ends meet, Marilyn kept the collectors from our door. Boys were boys. Food, shelter, and health were good except towards the last for my sweetie. But even then, hindsight shows there was good during that time.

​I tried to let the boys find their own lives (most of the time) whether it be hunting or whatever. There was a while they were scouting and going to the church by bus in Barre. Marilyn always said she believed and said her prayers, but I was still in the “show me stage”. 

​The boys have long since been on their own, having families, even to the point of some grandkids being in the mix. I believe God honored what I had asked for, as many do, in a moment of realizing I had little if any control of life and death and asked for His help, promising to repay the favor. And yet as the years passed, and life was worldly good, He did not collect on his debt. Marilyn’s health was declining and maybe that was God’s way of trying to get my attention, but I was too blind to see it.

On June 4th, 2019, my world came crashing down on me. I lost my reason for living. That was the day my sweetie died. She had fought for a long time and things were getting worse. More than once she would ask “I wonder why I’m still here?” We had talked with each other about the end of life, and we both agreed about the way she wanted it to end. Even in this sorrowful time I now see that God was still beckoning to the prodigal son even though I was still resisting. She wanted to die in her own bed,which she did, and I was able to provide her comfort with help from Hospice till her last breath. She had one wish that I had not been able to provide her closure on and she died with it not filled. That wish was that I would find faith to believe in God. I could have lied to her and said I found it, but we had always been honest and truthful even though it caused pain at times. We always healed through it making us stronger together.

​The house was now big and quiet because Marilyn brought life into it, making it a home filled with love and warmth. I found nothing interesting, and days were filled with thoughts of despair. People would call and check and do all the usual things centered around my widower status. I was busy doing what I had to do with things that needed doing, but there was an empty spot I could fill with nothing. 

​I can’t recall how it happened, but it might have been my friend from Waterbury (he is a widower also and I know him through the model plane club) that started the ball in motion. Anyway, I lay in bed one night and realized that that situation was almost identical to the day in Vietnam that I asked for God’s help with my problem. So, I went with Wendell one night shortly after to a Men’s Bible study. Sound familiar? 

​Since that time, which was probably late June to early July 2019, I started reading the Bible I gave Marilyn in1963 and searching the Internet about topics I had questions on like, “life after death”and “angels.” Truthfully, I feel like I have been in seminary since that time because I have been studying and learning so much that I never knew or was told wrong about (old wives’ tales). Now, I cannot wait to see Marilyn so she will see that her wish and hope was fulfilled, and she was responsible for mygetting there in more ways than one. 

​Now my hope is that I can share what I have learned since knowledge and wisdom has filledthose places where I had doubt with faith and truth.

So, do you choose to live a worldly life or a spiritual life that promises things such as meeting your loved ones in the afterlife? Without Jesus there is no heavenly conformation.

Fred Spencer

I  was brought up in the Episcopal church and we were ardent attendees. I  was pleased with my extensive cluster of perfect attendance pins, but I  wasn't aware of a personal relationship with Jesus.

The  year was 1974 when I met an attractive girl at the University of Denver  who asked me, "What do you think of Jesus?" Well, it had been a while  since I had considered such a topic. My response was something to the  effect that "He was a nice guy". That certainly didn't win any points.  So, along with her coaching and that of some members of Campus Crusade  for Christ I began my walk with Jesus. At that time, I accepted Jesus as  my personal savior and have been blessed with his love and that of my  wife, Suzy, ever since.

Life with Jesus has been a great adventure and I pray that you experience it too.